Of Valleys and Moonrises: A Whole Lot About Chile

Saturday, February 8 – Santiago, Chile

Wow…I can’t believe I made it. That was a very long flight. 11 hours from LAX, which involved a fun celebrity encounter with the nihilist from the Big Lebowski, Peter Stormare. I helped him pick out a beer that had zero hop flavor and in return he bought me a beer, how nice!

I arrived VERY early in the morning to Santiago. As my cab took me to my hotel, the sun was just rising and the city was very shut down still. Those metal gates that shopkeepers use in Europe are also very apparent here, though more graffitied. Getting a cab from the airport was, a little much with being so freshly jet lagged. Basically, all these car companies are hustling for you, and you get a quote. Then you get a ticket that looks like a lottery ticket, then a counter was involved and JFC I just wanted to take an Uber but I forgot to figure out if Uber even came the airport ahead of time. It all worked out fine though. Speaking of small pieces of paper you should not lose, when you arrive and go through Chilean immigration, you get something called a Tarjeta de Turismo or Tourist Card. It is literally printed on receipt paper. You would think that “TDT” or “TC” would be the acronym plastered across this thing when you get it but you would be WRONG. This is issued by the Policía de Investigaciones de Chile so it will say “PDP” and that shit serves as proof of your legal entry and allows you to stay in the country for up to 90 days. It is crucial to keep this document safe, as you will need it to leave the country and to potentially avoid the 19% VAT on your hotel stay. All my hotels requested this.

*Phenomenal Personal Patio, Itty Bitty Living Space at Maison Italia*

I arrived at my hotel in the Barrio Italia which is not an Italian immigrant part of town but is rather named after the main street. My Hotel is called Maison Italia. I am able to wrangle an early check-in (YES), the room is very small, not Venice small but it might be next in line of the smallest hotel rooms list, however, there is a bangin’ personal balcony with mini succulent garden so I hope that cancels out that I can here every door in the hallway close and my neighbors hocking the sickest loogies I have ever heard hocked, and my Dad is the loogie hocking king.

It turns out I have arrived on the hottest day that Santiago has had this year so far. Reminder its summer in the southern hemisphere and snow is expected in PDX soon so yeah, this is a weird, but welcome shift, going from practically about to snow to 95 degrees. But again, this was always the plan because, say it with me now, FEBRUARY SUCKS. I don’t give a shit if it’s the shortest month it’s also the most IM OVER WINTER MONTH.

After my nap, I had a latte and oh boy I really should’ve learned more Spanish before coming here. I think I just got some weird non-lactose milk? Anyway, my main plan for the rest of the day is to just walk around, hopefully before it gets too hot and explore the neighborhood. I feel very unmotivated to figure out much today.

Later that day…

Okay! I walked down the Ave Italia and there are lots of bars, restaurants, malls, mercados, bizarre stalls selling verging degrees of plastics crap and knick-knacks. I guess in Chile these places are for cosmetics and essentials and not so much original art and food vittles. Only one place had an original artist named Victor who did spray paint and stencil acrylic thing. There were a few food things but really mostly cosmetics type things. I went to this place where I got an iced cocoa which was 62% percent cocoa which was essentially just a hot chocolate that got poured over ice but it worked!

There is some light “come to my restaurant” hustling around here and there really are too many choices so I landed on Pescado Rabioso because they have an atrium garden looking patio thing with fans. This is where I continue my smiling and nodding and pretending to understand Spanish with varying degrees of success. I got a classico ceviche of reineta (which google tells me is a ray-finned fish) with sweet potato and Peruvian corn and a cerveza from Patagonia. I was also given two different types of mayonnaise with this for the sweet potato chips. I did my research before and I am definitely expecting a lot of mayo on this trip.

After this meal I needed to go back to the hotel to chill the mind and body because fuck it got so hot. It is here that I realized that the Modern Art Museum that I was hoping to visit is A) Not Air-Conditioned and B) Not open on Monday which is the day I had planned to go. In fact, this is when I realize that my grand fuck around the city day planned for Monday was NOT a good day of the week to choose because basically ALL the museums are closed AND the cool-ass cable car thing. Don’t be me. If you ever visit Santiago with the intention of going to museums, avoid Monday.

So, I pivoted to an a.m. walking tour because this place is fucking huge and I need some guidance and will hopefully help familiarize myself with the city some more, though again through research, I am aware of some places I should probably avoid as with any big city. I feel comfortable and safe in Barrio Italia. It has a fun local vibe.

Right now, I’m alternating between my cute personal patio and people watching and back to my 69 degree air conditioned room. Soon I will be getting ready for 1 of 3 fancy dinners planned for Santiago.

Later that evening…

I am now at La Calma which features ALL Chilean wine and all the delights of the sea. I’m in raw fish heavennnnnnn. I just had a mixture of Chilean and Japanese Oysters and a Reisling form the Colchagua, and a Semillon from the Itata in Bio Bio that has a beautiful bouquet of chamomile, apricots, hazelnuts, and meyer lemon). I won’t lie, the Chilean oysters where very different, more blob-like and beige. Not bad, but also not my favorite as they are missing the cool briny flavor or my beloved PNW Oysters. I liked the Japanese ones better. Sorry Chile!

I was excited to try the wine from the Itata Valley, which is something rarely seen at wine shops or on wine lists in the States. The Itata Valley is a historic winemaking region located in the Biobío and Ñuble regions of southern Chile. Vines were first planted around 1550, making the Itata Valley one of the oldest and most historic wine regions in Chile.

Situated close to the Pacific Ocean, the valley receives high rainfall and cloud cover compared to Chile's central regions. The cool coastal influence allows for a slower ripening period, which helps retain acidity and create fresh, balanced wines. The main grape varieties are Pais and Muscat of Alexandria, which have grown there for centuries. This wine region is not set up for tourism like Americans expect. Only expect to visit wineries here with a lot of research, references and connections.

Next I was very adventurous and got a cold broth with sea snails and urchins. There was also a side of this homemade blonde bread and butter with a ceviche of seaweed. Look, there are a lot of Americans and other tourists here because we are all basic bitches that saw this restaurant on Somebody Feed Phil and came here. There is this fairly large table of several Japanese American lesbian couples and they are being so difficult without realizing it but not in a mean way, and omg this poor waiter but also it’s very entertaining to watch.

I think this area of town I am in now is where my next hotel is. I booked two different hotels for Santiago so I could experience two different parts of the city which I think is wise when you are staying in a large city more than 4 days. So you can make the most out of your visit. I mean this place is the second most populated city in South American after San Paulo which is 12 million and Santiago is 6 million. That is more than the entire state of Oregon.

I’m excited to go the to The Jazz Corner later because in case you didn’t know it I’m a slut for jazz….Horace Silver, Keith Jarret, Chet Baker, Gene Kruppa, Miles Davis, Bill Evans, Ornette Coleman, Charles Mingus, Bix Beiderbecke….and according to my Spotify wrapped, A LOT modern Scandinavian jazz. (I really like the Emil Brandqvist Trio) I’m going to see The Juan Pablo Salvo Trio tonight!

Tomorrow I’m doing a wine tour in the Maipo Valley that I will need to get up for at 7:30. And I was wrong about the time change…5 hours ahead instead of 4 , but that sure is better than 9 hours! Ugh Europe, why you gotta time change me so hard all the time!

So yeah, the drive to and from La Calma was 18 minutes. I got to see more of the city which is much nicer than the a.m. culture shock drop. There are lots of little parks and bike lanes but all the buildings give 1970s vibes. I guess I really wasn’t sure what to expect architecture wise. I do hope to learn more about the country’s history on this trip.

Also, it is cray cray here on a Saturday. I guess I was the only nut job walking around in that hot hot heat earlier because it feels proper bumping now.

Later later that night…

I am now at The Jazz Corner. Diggin’ the Juan Pablo Salvo Trio QUARTET! That is right folks, we have JPS on the trumpet, then others on the stand-up bass, guitar, and drums.

It is a bit warm in here. It only got down to 82 but at least it’s dry heat and not humid. Also, on the plus side, I think I’m finally getting a grasp on the Chilean Peso situation. The Jazz corner has some fun cocktails and pub grub shit like pizza, etc.

Sunday, February 9 – Maipo Valley

It’s my first wine tasting day! Well, it’s actually 9 p.m. now, but I got back at 6:30 and crashed HARD. The dogs were barking. Really the whole body was barking.

I was second to last picked up on this wine tour, and you know my ass was the only single person there so let’s recap my couple co-travelers:

South Koren “Brian” and his long-distance GF who he met on the apps and she is from Chile. At first they were obnoxious, like making out everywhere and taking a bunch of selfies but at lunch they let me sit between them even though I offered to have them sit next to each other and they grew on me. Apparently this is their first meeting! Long distance love and their only common language is English so he is teaching her some Korean and she is teaching him Spanish. Okay they are cute.

A Polish couple from Warsaw and when I tried a polish heritage flex it didn’t go over as well as I thought it would. The wife was embarrassed that she was his second wife? They were nice but a bit stand-offish.

Yvonne and Husband from Orange County on their honeymoon, coming back from Patagonia which is apparently a hot honeymoon spot. I sat next to them in the van.

Another mixed culture relationship, guy was from the Netherlands who had the most don’t give a fuck attitude in the funniest way, like he wasn’t an asshole just so completely disinterested and invested at the same time? I cannot explant it. His GF is also from Chile. Him and “Brian” talked about AI.

Couple from Brazil, Meh. Fine. They were nice, not memorable.

I DID make a friend from the other group that was on the same route as our van who was also traveling alone. Too bad we were not in the same van. She was from Edinburgh Scotland and was a lawyer. Ha! Her name was Lauren. Lauren was rad. She too was escaping shite February weather in the Northern Hemisphere.

The Maipo Valley is located just south of Santiago and is a prominent wine-producing region known for its Cabernet Sauvignon and other popular Chilean grapes like Carmenère, Syrah, and Merlot. The region is bordered by the Andes Mountains and has lovely views and landscapes favorable to outdoor activities, especially in the Cajón del Maipo, where I will eventually be hiking.

The Maipo Valley also has a semi-arid Mediterranean climate, It has warm, dry summers and cool, wet winters. The Andes Mountains contribute to the daily temperature fluctuation which allows grapes to ripen slowly, concentrating flavors and balancing acidity. As previously mentioned, while most known for its bold red varietals, the valley’s cooler pockets cultivate white grapes such as Sauvignon Blanc and Chardonnay, through with slighter more body the Casablanca Valley closer to the coast.

Our first stop was Vina Undurraga in the Maipo Valley. It is one of the oldest wineries in Chile, founded in 1885. I saw Petite Sirah bunches dropping to the ground (it’s about to be harvest here) and these “sacrifice” rose bushes for determining if the row is danger of a pest attack. Our guide told us the great Carménère Story (which our guide Stephanie told us on the way up, and that I will hear two more times today for a grand total of 4) But Benjamin said the mistake was Cab Franc when it was really Merlot which is a pretty glaring historical story telling error.

The cliff’s notes of the story are this: When cuttings were imported from Bordeaux to Chile in the 19th century, Carmenère vines were accidentally included with Merlot due to their visual similarities. Following the phylloxera epidemic that devastated European vineyards in the late 1800s, the French believed the Carmenère grape was extinct. However, winemakers in Chile continued to cultivate it, mistakenly thinking the different-tasting grapes were simply a unique Chilean clone of Merlot. The true identity of the "lost" grape was only revealed in 1994 when a French ampelographer identified the distinctive, late-ripening vines as Carmenère. While the leaf shape is very similar, Carmenère leaf veins will turn a distinct shade of red around harvest that is more associated with autumn foliage change.

There were 3 winery dogs at Undurraga whose names where Cabernet Sauvignon, Merlot, and Carménère. Carménère was my fav. They are former strays whose job it is to keep rabbits from pooping in the vine rows so they scare them off or frankly sometimes probably kill them.

There was a cool little vine garden with all the varietals so you could see the difference between the leaves and taste the grapes and JFC the seeds are big. The wine here was unfortunately, pretty meh. The Cab Sauv and Carménère were a bit funky, maybe over extracted? I got a bottle of the late harvest white because it was small, good suitcase wine treat. It will be great with some funky stinky cheese. Remember folks sweet wine and smelly soft to medium cheese are a match made in heaven.

The next winery was Santa Ema which had a really beautiful outdoor tasting space and the wine was really good! The chardonnay was steely but had a nice Chamomile/pineapple/lemon verbena thing happening. The main somm/educator was a bit sassy, like I get it, 20 tipsy strangers who are just getting to know each other are super obnoxious.

Next was lunch at Zinfandel. I tried the pisco sour, the Peruvian version which I’m told is better. And I tried it just to say I’ve had one because I knew that shit would give me heartburn and boy oh howdy the fuck it sure did. I had pumpkin soup which was really good for an app then totally ordered wrong for the main which was this thing I have seen on other menus which is scallops with parmesan cheese and NOPE! Clean that poop chute people and also the cheese was just too much, and too burnt.

Third stop was the winery that was more on the farm side of things. Unfiltered Carménère (no thanks) Saw chickens with feather pants, dogs, alpacas, horse, sheep, and I got to feed a cow some alfalfa. Also saw weird leather goods like a domino holder belt thing. Guess people can get pretty serious about Dominoes. I also saw some more archaic wine making devises, like bamboo woven together and then grape bunches where hand pressed over it to remove the skins. Not use anymore, but I love seeing how people used to figure out the crush.

Once back at the hotel I took a mini nap from 7:30 to 8:30 and barley woke up to go to Taco Sanchez, good tacos, there was one server who spoke English named Martin. Martin got off as I was leaving and really wanted to talk to me so we walked down Barrio Italia for a while He was 27 and wanted to go out for another drink. I said maybe another time that I was also only in Santiago for one more day (sort of a fib) and he started to get a bit too excited about going to some neighborhood outside the city, eh… Anyway he was really nice and did seem harmless and it was a nice compliment.

Monday, February 10 – Santiago

My walking tour this morning was also some sort of scam BS…weird drop off point, no guide communications before or after I was like, “um where the fuck are you?” Thankfully I was refunded and close to the only museum that is open on Mondays, which is about Franciscan monks? Bishops? Friars? Cardinals? I don’t understand Catholicism other than the guilt part and what I have seen in movies based in Ireland, Italy, and Boston, and it sounds wicked oppressive my dudes and laddies. This museum, despite its barrage of super religious iconography and bishop capes giving 1970s Elvis vibes, has a BEAUTIFUL garden with peacocks, turtles, partridges, orange trees, walking paths. I literally just sat at the fountain for like 30 minutes and watched the turtles which at first I thought were just stone parts of the fountain. I read after that fact that Museo Colonial is a historical, cultural and religious museum that explores the colonial period of Chile and South America, with a collection of paintings, sculpture, furniture and other objects. Many of the pieces are religious (eh more like all of them), and were created in Peru, the former colonial capital.

I then tried to go to this cultural center which was also mostly basically closed but they had a cool looking cinema exhibition thing I wanted to learn more about but the “help” people where fucking assholes so I guess I’ll never know!

I found a park called Cerro Santa Lucia and hiked up a massive hill to a lookout point with steep steps. Then there was this little turret thing with 360-degree views of the city which really is just massive, I mean 6 million people. This area is part of a larger park system which is cool but this is enough altitude for one day because I still have more walking to do. In fact, I walked to the Bella Vista Barrio which is a collage area, closest to San Sebastian University. I’m having a beer sampler at Krossbar. The beer is just okay, very soapy tasting.

I survived central Santiago today. At least I think I was in the CBD, hard to tell with a billion buildings and so many vendors selling plastic crap; combs, hair ties, shitty jewelry, like who is this for and when literally all the them are selling the same shit it’s a saturated market. There was also their VERY strange Dubai perfumery where the guy was straight up out-front singing into a microphone, and there were Sheikh mannequins and THE SMELL was like drinking a bottle of cologne. IT. WAS. A. LOT. OF. STIMULAS. One day in this part of town is plenty.

It is now 6:45 and I’m having a glass of sparkling wine (from Chile of course) before I walk to dinner, just a mile away but I also walked a lot today and I’m sick of Ubers. My very first one today was driving like he was on meth and blasting tech music. Then I got a micro Suzuki for my voyage from Maison Italia to Hote Le Reve which was pain with my luggage…

The Hotel Le Reve is in the Providencia area. The hotel is giving 55 and over vibes, a little like my hotel in Bolzano. My room is more spacious which is great and Netflix actually works so I can relax to my favorite low commitment comfort show of foreign travel, Brooklyn 99.

I am still lowkey tripping about the Valparaiso portion of this trip. The internet has convinced me I’ll get mugged and my car will be stolen. I will have to drive a car out of Santiago, did I mention this? Thankfully I’m told February is when everyone who lives in Santiago goes on vacation so the traffic isn’t half as bad as it usually is.

It is now 8:02 p.m. I am at Ambrosia Bistro. Providencia Ave was giving Venice vibes. Dodging swarms of people. Again, reminded of the sheer amount of people that live here and how I’m not made to live in places like here, Tokyo, NYC, or really anywhere where your number one goal when getting from point A to B is dodging people. Vacation, fine. Everyday? No.

*I now want all by quinoa crispy after this dish at Ambrosia*

Ambrosia is in a new spot in a fancy building with lots of other places and it has NO ALCOHOL PERMIT which means no wine pairing with dinner which is tragic! Apparently the Chilean alcohol permitting bureau or whatever sucks just as much as Oregon! Everything on the menu looking so god damn good. I went with conchas with crispy quinoa, fish curry with cucumber noodles and a baby burger because I haven’t had red meat in a minute and I’m feeling my iron dip.

Tuesday , February 11 - Casablanca Valley and Santiago

8:00 p.m. Currently at Borago for the surprise summer menu with wine pairing. The theme of this 10-course tasting menu is tomato. This is the biggest splurge meal of this trip. It’s a top 100 international restaurant. My water is rainwater. My welcome wine is a traditional method from Colchagua with notes of lemon pith, yogurt, quince, and toasted almond.

I drank out of a giant tomato which had tomato and watermelon juice in it and maybe something else, its hard to keep up with these sous chefs who whiz by and present the food to you, same with the somms.

The first course was this edible flower which was not made out of flower at all but out of some native root thing with another form of tomato and a crunchy herb leaf then some cold cream concoction that made the wine taste better. There sure are a lot of wines that are blends of an insane amount of grapes.

I then had some tempura dill flowers and a bee made out of cheese and dipped into some truffle thing.

I had a lovely orange wine that is a Chard/Sauv Blanc blend paired with a BARNACLE. I got over how fucking gross barnacles look and I ate it.

*There was a lobster situation with beans and flowers. It was beautiful!*

Then there was a muscle in a creamy broth thing, yum. Id elaborate more here but the people come in so fast and talk so fast and my tired brain doesn’t have time to compute all the dish components!

There was a delightful fish dish with a Reisling from the Rapel Valley that only does varietal wines. Strong rubber hose nose on this one which I love.

Fuck I’m already so full and now there is the blue fin tuna that has three different blue hues sauces on it, I think I heard something about a hollandaise made with seaweed? Had it with a malbec.

Then I had a 2011 Cab Sauv which had this intense menthol, blackberry, cassis, anise, tobacco thing going on. It was incredible. Had with the famous lamb that is spit roasted all day and braised it its own fat and oh boy, I tried a little but I don’t dance with lamb.

Now I’m onto, YIKES 3 different desserts? Having a Muscatel from the Atacama desert, not late harvest, just dry but super aromatic but maybe not the right aromatics? Maybe my nose is shot or the monsters sitting nearby who wore strong cologne to fine dining (STOP EVERYONE we want to smell the foods and wine NOT YOU) but yeah but this Muscatel kind of smells like BBQ tomatoes, tangerine, apricot and orange blossom. Just had a desert that focused on sea strawberries which did in fact have the essence of Strawberry, this is where I lost the plot and stopped writing.

Anyway, back to the wine tasting portion of this day. First off this was a super fun day! My group was Jan (YANN – German “John”) and Julia from Germany and Cullen from Portland, Maine. Portland and Portland representing in Casablanca! His wife encouraged him to take this trip between the start of his new job, how very thoughtful of her. We found out we are both going to be in Valparaiso at the same time so hopefully we meet up there.

The Casablanca Valley is defined by its cool, coastal Mediterranean climate, which allows for a long, slow ripening period that produces wines with excellent freshness and acidity. The proximity to the Pacific Ocean provides maritime influences like cool breezes and a morning fog, which tempers the hot afternoon sun. These conditions make the valley ideal for growing cool-climate varietals, most notably Sauvignon Blanc and Chardonnay, as well as high-quality Pinot Noir and Syrah. The resulting wines are often distinguished by vibrant fruit flavors and a characteristic minerality derived from the region's ancient granitic and clay soils.

Ignacio was our guide and we had a sister tour van with 2 other couples, a set of Vancouver BC gays and some elder Fort Lauderdale gays, YAS! They were great, more on them later. Our drive into the Casablanca was nicer than it was going into the Maipo, much greener in this valley. Our first Winery was Emiliana where we tried a Chardonnay, a Carménère and a blend with way too many fucking grapes. I got Julia and the gang on board to go try some more stuff because I’m already so sick of Carménère. SORRY! I like it just not every god damn day. SO yeah, also tried their Sauv Blanc, Viognier, and Rose. I bought an orange wine and the Viognier. The property was gorgeous as was the tasting room and the garden. They had alpacas who were adorable with very intense underbites. The winery is all organic and biodynamic and there was chamomile plants growing amongst the Chardonnay vines. I really could’ve spent all day there.

Next was Vinamar which was a sparkling wine house. They were in the middle of a replanting cycle which was cool to see, they had torn up a bunch of Sauv Blanc and something else because they don’t want their vines to get too old because they need to maintain their yields. They only do one traditional method, everything else is charmant. They were pretty tasty, but didn’t buy anything here because we can’t trust bubbs in the airplane cargo hold. This is where I bonded with the Vancouver gays, sadly I don’t think any names were exchanged but we were excited to hang out at the next winery together which was called Bodegas RE which was doing some real experimental shit like mixing red and white varietals together that I don’t necessarily think would work together? Some of it did, some of it didn’t, but I did buy another orange wine here which was a mix of Gewürztraminer and Reisling and was discounted because it was missing a label. This is the winery that I bonded with the Ft. Lauderdale gays. They had a shih tzu named Brutus and he talked about he won’t do republicans hair because he was a hairdresser, and I got a little weepy about my recently passed friend and hairdresser of 20 years, Nicole, and he was very sweet about it.

*One of Vina Casas del Bosque’s many garden areas*

Next we had a very late lunch at Vina Casas del Bosque at their restaurant called Tanino. Had the Chard and Sauv Blanc with my polenta that literally tasted and looked like mashed potatoes with garden veggies. At lunch I found out that Jan was an IP lawyer, Julia was an engineer for public works and Cullen a PT.

Wednesday, February 12 – Andes Hike day / Maipo Canyon

I was picked up at 6:30 a.m. I was the last. In my group were an older German couple and a weird couple, sister trio from Seattle and one that that seemed like he was with them but wasn’t? Unsure on that situation. The guides were Elias and Jose. Two dudes that were incredibly kind and understanding. Look, I was “the worst” of this group all day. I was always way behind. It felt really defeating in a lot of ways. At some points I was literally inhaling people’s dust that I coughed and hacked up so hard the next day.

The hike was two hours away in the Cajon de Maipo. We parked at the trailhead by a “farm” which to me was more an animal abuse situation at least for the dogs. They let you use their toilet for 500 Pesos. I saw a dog fight, an injured dog, a dog getting rocks thrown at it, it was fucking awful. The first part of the hike was like a mile uphill on really steep rocky terrain and my calf locked up really fast and I panicked. I ate my banana and chugged a bunch of water and our first “stop and learn something rest”. We eventually got to a grassier valley with streams and wild horses and goats from the farmers. The deal is that from Spring to Summer the dog abusers raise animals, let them graze the mountains, then sell them before winter and go back to the city.

The hike was obviously beautiful. The mountains had all these vertical layers of Iron, Copper, etc., and it was very sunny but it never felt hot and there was always a cool breeze which was good which meant I could wear my hoodie most of the time to protect myself from the sun. At one point we hiked along a stream and Jose had to find some old board so that we could cross it. How rustic. We saw lots of condors. The other group from Seattle were odd, they were medium friendly, I don’t know, a bit standoffish, like we talked but never got beyond hike observances. There was another stray dog and I literally can’t. He looked so sweet and rundown and had mange or something and one of the girls gave him her sandwich. All these poor neglected babies. I could never live here, I would have to start a dog rescue and learn Spanish.

*Behold, me and wild horses with majestic steam*

There was this sweet yellow bird that hung out with us for a while chirping about. Once we got the end or turnaround point I had a mini meltdown about Nicole and Jose got all poetic and philosophical about how the mountains affect us, how he just lost his grandfather who he was close to and how he thinks of him up here. The way back went much quicker. We then had a little final picnic thing in this weird spot with all this horseshit all over the road but okay. Cute little spread of grapes, oranges, meat, cheese, crackers, and you guessed it, Carménère! No. I don’t want this big ass red wine after a hike lol. I mean I did have a celebratory glass. It was worth it.

*View from the AirBnB of the hills and neighboring cities*

It was pretty easy to get out of Santiago and onto the 68. 1 hour and 35 minutes later and there were like ZERO Copecs on my side of the road. WTF? I had to pee on the side of the road using the car door trick and good thing I did because there was no key when I got to the Airbnb. Found a parking spot (barely) which is also close to my Airbnb. Turns out the cleaning lady was just behind and she eventually came down with the key, we tried our best to communicate but even google translate was failing pretty bad.

This place is very cute, it has a balcony with amazing views of the ocean and the city. There are of course, 4 flights of stairs to get up here. After I pounded half a bottle of Santa Ema Chardonnay and collected myself, Cullen came over and we had a glass of wine on the balcony. We then walked around a bit, checked out his hotel which was further up the hill then we had dinner at Fauna which was the restaurant and hotel that was across the way from the church which was by me. Fauna had a roof top and nice view of the city. We split some tuna ceviche, an apple, ham, and cheese sandwich, and mushroom gnocchi with veg all while learning more about each other. Then we got ice cream and walked around some more. I got pistachio (duh) and sandia (watermelon). On this walk we learned the lesson of “stay on the main streets” when we adventurously decided to go down a random set of stairs and it got real sketchy real quick. This place really is incredibly cool I just wish there wasn’t this background threat of crime. There is art and restaurants everywhere and it has very bohemian vibes.

Tonight, in the night that I think I watched my first ever moon rise. Surely I have seen this before but it feels like he first time. It slowly started to come up over the hill, orange tinted and then the higher it got the whiter it became and started arching over the hill side ascending higher into the sky. I was completely transfixed in this moment, and I really felt like I could feel the earth spinning. This trip is really a strange fixture of emotions, beauty, excitement, grief and anxiety. I have a planned private walking tour for tomorrow, better start resting these legs.

P.s. The seagulls here sound like cackling witches, or as Cullen pointed out, Hyenas. Crazy.

Friday, February 14 – Valparaiso

Thank you for the early wakeup call you cackling seagulls! Can you hold your morning meeting on another rooftop please? I slept like crap from all the random noises thinking the worst. I need to chill. Spent most of the morning flipping out about tomorrow, as in getting out of town and back into it. I have to walk into a more central part of town today so hopefully that isn’t as scary as everyone whose crossed my path has led me to believe.

Today I found out that coffee shops and bakeries don’t open until 10:00 a.m. after going around for wonder. Eventually just landed on the little café below my Airbnb. I had completely unseasoned scrambled eggs and dry toast because they didn’t have butter and strawberry juice which was a fun option. Walked 12 minutes and down a lot of stairs to the main square by the port called Sotamayor. Met up with Benjamin, my very likely on the spectrum tour guide. There was so so much information and I was very distracted by street art. I know that Arturo Prat was a big deal because of the statue of him in the square. He was a Chilean naval officer and lawyer who is celebrated as a national hero. His heroic death in the Battle of Iquique during the War of the Pacific made him a martyr for the Chilean cause and a symbol of patriotism.

Saw the old Navy building, learned about, and rode, a funicular which were historically used to take people from their houses in the hills into the financial district. Then we hung out in the hills after that and he showed me lots of murals, street art, and I took a ton of pictures. We stopped at this empanada window but they resemble pasties more, whatever, it’s all Hot Pockets to me! I got some chicken and cheese thing and man it was bad, dry seasonless chicken, gobs of a super neutral cheese, and the pastry was dry. 0 for 2 on food today. We stopped at this gallery that had art for sale by some of the muralist from around my lodging and I bought some stuff from Newenki and Lanko, who was actually manning the shop and was so enthusiastic and jovial. He has a unique style for sure and really loved my hat because it has some purple and teal in it and purple is one of his favorite colors.

I’m now waiting for Cullen and we are going to take the metro to Vina del Mar, the beach town next to Valparaiso. Do I want to use this public transport? Nope! I’m only doing it because Cullen has done if before do he will be my metro sherpa.

*The main beach at Vina del Mar with the Chilean Naval Fleet on the horizon*

Okay it is now 9:00 pm. And hot damn I did a lot of walking today. We went down to the metro and I got a card which wasn’t so bad but I misunderstood how to load money onto it then it was only like 15 minutes to Vina Del Mar, then another 20 minute walk to the beach which was medium crowded. There were vendors all along the promenade, weird juggling and flag spinning at intersections which gets quite aggressive here actually, like what if you drop your balls when the light turns green? There was Mickey and Minnie…lot of random stuff.

I continued the day of terrible eating with a churro stuffed with caramel and potato chips, and peanut M&Ms for protein! We eventually found a spot to plant in the sand and talked and people watched. We then decided it was time for a bevy and we went to this place with a patio and OMG they could not understand that I wanted a lime with my corona and then I got a lemonade and it was a debacle and now I’m convinced people in Chile don’t know what limes are despite me literally bringing up a picture of an actual lime on my phone. Again, I really should’ve tried to learn more Spanish before I came here.

We made our way back to the metro, very tired and dehydrated before heading to dinner to Café Vinilo where I ordered the Chilean dish of corn custard with minced meat chicken, and egg and it’s a bit like a Shepards Pie. Finally tried a beer from SOPH Brewery which was the place I was trying to get a beer from in Santiago. Anyway, back at the casa waiting for the moon to rise so I can wash off all the sunscreen and sand.

Saturday, February 15 – Aconcagua Valley Day

Slept pretty good despite the cackling which I guess means I’m just getting used to it now. Looking forward to a little less walking today. I feel a little less anxious about leaving Valparaiso today though I am now more concerned about returning seeing how busy it got around dinner time last night. I’m leaving at 10:00 for a two-hour drive to the Flaherty winery then 30 minutes to Viña Sanchez de Loria then somehow only an hour back to the city.

The getting in and out of Valparaiso itself isn’t so bad, it’s really just when you hit this top part of town where is gets difficult. The freeways are easy to navigate and there are quite a lot of tolls which luckily if you have a rental car like I do, you have one of those things that automatically dings and you pay at the end at the rental car place.

The Aconcagua Valley is a historic wine region north of Santiago, Chile, famous for its high-quality red wines and dramatic scenery. The valley is named for the Aconcagua River, which flows from the Andes and provides meltwater for irrigation, and for Mount Aconcagua, the highest peak in the Americas, located nearby on the Chile-Argentina border.

The Aconcagua Valley features a hot, dry Mediterranean climate with significant daily temperature swings, thanks to cool ocean breezes from the Pacific and cold air descending from the Andes. The region is particularly renowned for producing exceptional red wines, with prominent varieties including Cabernet Sauvignon, Syrah, Carmenère, and Merlot. However, cooler coastal areas within the valley are suited for quality examples of white varieties such as Sauvignon Blanc and Chardonnay. The trifecta of dry conditions, unique sandy soils, and the Andean meltwater, contribute to the grapes' concentration and complexity.

*The Flaherty’s garden had fruit growing everywhere!*

Flaherty Wines is in El Tambo outside of San Felipe. Ed and Jen Flaherty moved to Chile 30 years ago (1993), her for an anthropology thesis and him to be a wine consult as he has been working in Napa at that point and had gone to UC Davis. The property consists of an old colonial hacienda and beautiful gardens with pergolas and fruit trees and some tempranillo vines. There are two winery cats called Cat Vader, and Luke Catwalker, and a dog named Chewbacca. Ed mostly has contracts with grape growers and does consulting and custom crushes. I was with a couple that was 17 minutes late from Canada now living between Houston, Chile and Maryland and good god what am I doing with my life, and how do people afford 3 fucking houses. They were mostly very nice but dude was very uptight about the dog situation, another large group had brought a young dog that was pretty high energy and barky but he and Chewbacca were playing and it was cute, but I guess as I hate the shrill screams of children, dog barking must be this guy’s thing.

Ed mostly makes red blends out of Syrah, Cab Sauv, Carmenère, Tempranillo, Merlot, Malbec, you know, all those Chilean red grape staples.

Our first wine was a red blend from the Aconcagua of Syrah and Cab, Petit Verdot, and Tempranillo. Nose notes: black cherry, black berry, hoisin, black pepper, menthol; Palate notes: blackberry, dried cherry, black pepper (25 new 75 neutral French oak).

Wine 2: Aconcagua Carmenère that has softer tannins and lower acid and has a distinct red or green pepper smell called Pyrazines. This is also found in Cab Franc and Sauvignon Blanc. Nose Notes: chile pepper, bell pepper, strawberry, raspberry. Palate Notes: Cherry, Raspberry, chile pepper.

Wine 3: Malbec, Garnacha, Tempranillo and Petit Sirah blend from the Cauquenes Valley which is a sub-region of the Maule Valley. Longer in barrel (18 months + 1 year bottle age) Nose Notes: huckleberry, black cherry, menthol, violet. Palate Notes: spearmint, black cherry, violet , cassis

Wine 4: Tempranillo (2020) from Cauquenas Valley. Nose Notes: raspberry, black cherry, anise, fennel. Palate Notes: cranberry, fennel, blackberry.

There was also an amazing lunch prepared by Jenn that also came with more wine. For the appetizer we had mashed Lemon Verbena with beets, avocado and candied walnuts. For the main it was sous vide meat with a risotto of onions and albarello and for dessert a chocolate pavlova with espresso ice cream.

I bought a 100% Syrah which I didn’t taste but I love Syrah. But Jesus, I have to stop buying wine because my suitcase doth already runith over.

Next it was a 30-minute drive to Viña Sanchez de Loria which Ed told me was lacking in quality and I should have gone to this other place called Vina Von Siebenthal. In fact, I did find it difficult to find wineries to go to out here and was informed by Ed that wine tourism isn’t as robust here as other places. I got a little brochure that showed me the available ones and there were only 8 and only like 3 of those ever showed up in my internet searches.

Viña Sanchez involved going over some gnarly train tracks and I ended up being a bit late so now I was the Canadian couple to this other lovely couple from Los Andes whose secondary purpose to wine tasting was a photo shoot. Any way I felt bad because tour guy had to flip flop between Spanish and English and I’m sure that wore him out. So yeah this place started making wine in 1890s and did not even have electricity until the 1970s. They still use this very old, motorized press and fermentation takes place in these massive oak barriques and the fermentation is 30 days on the skins. That is a pretty long time with big reds. And boy oh boy did these wines tasted EXTRACTED. I also noticed that the cellar had no temperature control. There were also mad bats in the cellar, like I know bats are good for the ecosystem of the cellar (they eat the spiders!) but boy did I hear a lot of squeaking. There is a bat named Ramon that was pretty active. Please stay hidden Ramon. They also grow table grapes here and we got a tour of some of the old rooms which haven’t changed since the 1800s, which is wild, like the same furniture. There was another great winery dog here named Tinto. He was a sweet little goofball and he kept following us around but kept wanting to nap so he was always having to move to a new spot. 10 out of 10 for Tinto. It was a charming visit, and it was like a time capsule, and they were very nice.

On the way back I got a little turned around and google took be through this pretty poor village and ugh I can’t with some of the dog stuff I’m seeing. All these poor babies. Otherwise, once I got back onto the main highway it was fine, only minor traffic in Vina Del Mar, and I got an even closer parking spot to my Airbnb which is insane, like Friday was bonkers but this Saturday is super chill!

*More matcha raspberry croissants in my life please!*

Sunday, February 16 – Valparaiso

Woof. My body is starting to feel it. I was awoken at 8:30 by city sounds and then went to Maria Maria at 10:00 a.m. for brunch right when it opened and it was already practically full. This place has an amazing pastry selection, I got a raspberry, white chocolate and matcha croissant which was out of this world so I also got one for tomorrow. For main, avocado toast with deviled eggs. I wondered around a few markets in some little shopping squares, meandered and took my time before I made it to the Museum of Fine Art, or Palacio Baburizza, the former residence of Croatian immigrant, businessman, and philanthropist Pascual Baburizza. It was built in 1916 by Italian architects and eventually turned into a museum and fine arts school in 1971 and declared a historic monument in 1976. The architecture is wild, dubbed “Art Nouveau Chalet” and I get it. Much of the art in the building was owned by Baburizza or works by artists. Baburizza got rich from saltpeter aka Potassium Nitrate aka gunpowder. At some point the museum was taken over by Chilean artist Camilo Mori who painted in a variety of styles over the years that started with realism to postmodern. Cool dude and important figure in the country’s art history.

The first floor was mostly Baburizza’s collection which featured French, Spanish, Italian and Russian artists. I particularly liked a landscape piece called Neive by Russian painter Ivan Fedorovich Choultsé who really knows what is doing with capturing light and was a big fan or snow landscapes and spent time in Svalbard to paint them (Svalbard is one of the worlds northernmost inhabited places, archipelago north of Norway) He painted spectacular snow scenes in which the light seems to come from behind the canvas and glow. At the time his critics panned the art as too photographic but today this style of painting is called "magic-realism.” To see the brush strokes up close and how he created the effects was quite something. There is an original coming up for auction soon. Who wants to lend me 15K?

For dinner I made a reservation at the Ambrosia pop-up because I’m having food trust issues here and I know this will probably be good. What was strange was apparently the only time left for dinner was 6:30 but there is hardly anyone here in all this dining space. I’m in the loft/roof/outside area but there are only 4 tables with people. For an app I had seafood taquitos which were so good and finally a dish with some acid! It was this crab stew that had this lemon curd flavor but was creamy and was very full of crab. I guess the owner of the main restaurant in Santiago, its her brother who is in charge of this pop-up and he has this mini greyhound named Baco and he is so cute and always very concerned about his father’s whereabouts. Some nice couple who is just here to smoke and drink champagne and talk (and are far away enough so I can’t smell the smoke) the dude offered me some champ, how nice! This other German couple chain-smoking right next to me can suck it though.

Honestly I don’t think this place is as scary as it seems. Sure there was some riff raff around the port/mall area but the train station wasn’t that bad but also I do know there are probably some more unsafe areas and I know I’m in good area. Maybe I’m just used to the vibe here now and the anxiety is melting away, honestly this place is great if it were not for the background reputation or perceived reputation.

This is my last night here, as all I must do tomorrow is drive back to the Santiago airport and wait for my very late flight. One more moonrise for the memory bank.

Of Valleys and Moonrises: A Whole Lot About Chile

Scotland: The Return

Art | Wine | Adventure