Wine and Wind: A Whole Lot About Italy

My most ambitious trip yet, Italy, took place in April of this year. I had never felt such anxiety before a trip. 5 places in 12 days? Sure, I can do this, I thought. The anxiety started when I realized I couldn’t really rely on tours to get me to the places I wanted to go, mostly because what I was seeking had a requirement of 2 people. A bummer to see as a solo traveler. I knew I wanted to go to some smaller towns and the reality set in that I would need to rent a car. I spiraled a bit from there, going during a seasonal cross over time and needing to fill a carry-on to be prepared for snow, rain, and heat? I almost never do a “rehearsal” pack, but I did it like 5 different times for this trip. There was, of course, the language. This would be my first solo trip in a country where English was not the primary language.  I started to learn Italian the best I could, 6 months before I left.

The plan was completely dictated by a good flight deal I found to Venice. In reality, my first choice for an Italian trip would’ve been Sardinia but ever since Italian Wine Scholar, I was very fascinated by Alto-Adige and the town of Bolzano so I was excited to make that part of my trip as I was already going to be in the North.  But wait, I also really wanted to explore Emilia-Romagna and its food scene. What is a girl to do?  After much back and forth I decided the plan would be fly into Venice, immediately take a train to Bologna, then up to Bolzano, then to Garda, Soave, and finishing in Venice. Jesus take the wheel…

I left PDX on Tuesday April 2, but didn’t end up getting into Bologna until the following day at 10:00 p.m. so the first night in Bologna was basically a wash. While my prior Ireland plan of “let’s just take a train right away” worked, it was a bit more exhausting in this scenario in which it was about 8 hours to London from PDX, then about another 2-3 to Venice, taxi from Venice airport to Venice train station, the figuring out the maze that is the Bologna train station to the hotel.

Thursday, April 4 – Bologna

It is now 8 p.m. I have a glass of Fiano in front of me at a wine bar called Tricheco Osteria which translates to Walrus Tavern. Today was the first full day here after a fairly exhausting travel day yesterday. Those airbuses from Heathrow to the mainland Europe can suck it, that was the worse legroom I’ve experienced in my life. Anyway, the hotel is interesting, it is called Palazzo Gregorini Bingham, and it appears to be from the 1700s and was definitely probably owned by some rich dude at some point. The rooms are all on the top floor which appears to be only two stories up from the street but manages to somehow have 4 flights of stairs which at night can only be navigated with your cell phone flashlight because the motion sensor lights only kick in once you reach the hotel floor. I have no idea if the other floors are peoples’ apartments or what. It is very beautiful though. 

The morning started off with me sleeping in, missing my b-fast plans and hustling to a walking food and wine tour of central Bologna. I don’t remember the tour guide’s name, because the jet lag is bad, but he was great and the people in my group were fun too. I’m always a fun anomaly for the couples in these groups, they like to ask about my solo travels and I like to sit back and watch them interact with each other, it’s like fun society research for all involved.

We started off the tour with this pastry treat that had an intense filling of apple, pear, and grape. Then we went to a fancy deli, which are literally everywhere. I believe we are in the part of the city called the “Quadrilatero” which is basically the historical market district. We picked up 2 kinds of mortadella, and 2 kinds of prosciutto (one from the thigh and one from the butt) some salami rosso, and some Parmesan Reggiano of course. We took our wares to an unassuming place with no sign that is pretty well known, called Osteria Del Sole which translates into Tavern of the Sun. They have a frizzante style white wine made from Pignoletto grapes. The two most important white grape varietals of Emilia-Romagna are Albana and Pignoletto. Albana is a full-bodied white wine great for skin contact and botrytized style wines. It has been grown in Romagna since the middle ages. Pignoletto is light bodied and good for sparkling and still white wine. Its high acid is a great complement to all the parmesan and cream sauces here. Pignoletto is the local name for the grape, but its DNA profile has shown that it is identical to another white grape from Umbria called Grechetto.

Osteria Del Sole is pretty quirky, and old AF. This was the first appearance of “those toilets” which means that this place is so old the toilet is hole in the ground you stand or squat over. Don’t worry they still have an enamel basin around the hole, so it almost feels like a proper toilet, nice try Italy. Osteria Del Sole, according to Google, is “a landmark 15th century venue serving Romagna region wines to customers that bring their own food.” It is a hard rule here, you must drink wine. Amazing. Our tour guide told all the couples and families about the DOC denomination which I’m already knowledgeable about so I just focused on my snacks and wine, and basically became buzzed off one glass due to jet lag, missing breakfast, and only having deli meat in my stomach. Gout here I come!

Next we walked to a Trattoria. It’s important to note here that the main difference between an Osteria and a Trattoria in Italy is that “osterias are traditionally more casual and focus on wine, while trattorias are more like restaurants that serve traditional local food.” Therefore, at this trattoria that I can’t remember the name of because my brain is garbage right now, we had some traditional tortellini Bolognese and pasta alla Bolognaise. We paired these with a Sangiovese from Romagna. The tortellini was very toothsome. I also forgot to mention at some point that we went and watched tortellini making in action. A bunch of women were huddled around a massive bowl of meat and a canvas sized slab of pasta and they were all folding them at a crazy pace and just looking at it gave me thumb arthritis. 

At some point on our walkabout, our tour guide also told us about the three towers in the area, the old canal system and how it was used to trade silk with Venice. There are apparently still old silk mills underground that you can tour when the canal gets drained and cleaned for maintenance. Strange, like did it sink at some point? We went into another pastry type shop situation and had this “secret” dessert of rice and egg before going for gelato (of course) of which I had my favorite flavor on earth, pistachio, with hazelnut.

Other Bologna observations for the day include: Its very smokey! Like so much secondhand smoke. Lots of graffiti which is a shame because it is such a beautiful historic city, plus I’m probably over graffiti anyway since I live in Portland. It’s weird because otherwise the streets and city are all very clean. It is true that the Italians are very fashionable up north. Even the old Italian ladies are very done up, it’s a vibe. In this part of town I’m in, all the sidewalks are covered by decorative porticoes. They are all so gorgeous and unique. Some are inlayed with brick, others frescos, others embossed plaster designs. According to Google, “No other city in the world has as many porticoes as Bologna: all together, they cover more than 38 kilometers (24 mi) only in the historic center but can reach up to 53 kilometers (33 mi) if those outside the medieval city walls are also considered.”

The main square, Piazza Maggorie? Meh, It certainly is a gathering place, and I saw a lot of teenagers who all seemed to be wearing variations of the same outfit, baggy jeans and a white or black crop top for the girls and t-shirts for the guys. Speaking of “meh” I also went to the Mambo (Museum of Modern Art) and it was very underwhelming, very sparse. There were defiantly a few artists I will look more into later but overall just not a lot of stuff compared to other modern art museums I’ve been to. I was hoping to go to the medieval museum but that was closed. There is also an anatomy museum which looks cool as well in the University district which was on my list so hopefully I can get out that way. Tomorrow I get to deal with the rental car…

After the tour, I went back to the hotel to rest my feet and take a nap. I attempted to do dinner research since I was told that most restaurants require reservations (oops). After reading too many reviews for “best wine bar in Bologna” I settled on Trichero Osteria. My first attempt at Italian menu reading, eh not so good. Turns out this place is more “tapas” and more veggie/vegan focused so I ended up having a very crostini heavy dinner of cheese, crostini with butter and salted fish, crostini with this weird coleslaw like sauce, and these warm nut meatball things. After my Fiano, I had a skin contact Trebbiano and more secondhand smoke for dessert. On my way back to the hotel I spontaneously went to this outdoor café which had a lot of people outside for a probably unneeded final glass of wine. It was called Casa Minghetti and boy of boy do dudes love congregating right outside a restaurant entrance smoking. I also got to listen to a girl have a voice to text conversation, girl its text or a phone call because they can’t both be equally obnoxious.

Friday, April 5 – Bologna

Today was the great rental car day. Rental car places in Italy are only open weekdays so the plan is to pick it up then just park it until I have to leave because I am not driving in Bologna.

First was breakfast nearby at Lampadina and I was finally able to have a god damn latte, like a proper pulled espresso shot. Once again misunderstood the menu and ended up with MORE STUFF ON TOP OF BREAD. It was good though, like fancy avocado toast with burrata, pancetta, and balsamic.

At the rental car place, I’m pretty sure I was talked into extra coverage and everyone was really just casually late and it was a vibe. After all was said and done it cost more than I wanted but vacation money isn’t real! Right? My rental car is of an unknown manufacturer origin, called Dr. like a Doctor? It is also very red, well more burgundy I guess, like a Dr. Pepper can! Well, it looks distinct enough so I guess I’ll always be able to find it. Found a parking garage, dumped the car, walked back though the Bologna train station to re-orient myself.

Went back to the hotel to shower and promptly flooded the bathroom because Europe insists on this partial shower door aesthetic which is so impractical it makes me want to scream. After I wasted two clean towels sopping up shower water and making sure I didn’t slip and break my neck, I walked down to All’Osteria Bottega to make a reservation for dinner before they closed for lunch. BTW lunch time in Italy? That shit is done by one dawg, lucky if another place opens at 3 otherwise good luck until 7 or 8 pm! After reservations were completed, I headed to the medieval museum or Museo Civico Medieval, however, killing time until it opens at the cafeteria next door called Sebastian Cardi who might be some mainstream famous chef or pastry chef out here. He is giving Emeril vibes, but there is an extensive list of fancy macaroon flavor combos. Having a beet salad and like two macchiatos. Bring the coffee, all of it.

Just spend 2 hours at the medieval museum, it was quite a bit to digest with some of the oldest shit I’ve seen yet outside of the Dublin museum in Ireland. Some highlights in no particular order:

·       Horse helmets!

·       Weird drinking jugs, I liked the one with a dude kissing a duck

·       The bronze ewer (Germanic wine server) in the shape of a rider on a horse

·       Really creepy pastoral staff hook which was a snake with a mini snake skeleton popping out of its mouth

·       The maces and halbards (people were brutal, and I’m weird because I like them?)

·       Statue with a portly man and a very large ham that he seemed to truly be in love with. “Man and his Ham” 435 AD

Anyway, now I am enjoying a skin contact Albana from the Romana Albana DOCG. Is it very good – yellow apple, mandarin orange, and something savory, maybe sage or peppercorn? This is the wine bar that kept coming up when I goggled “best wine bars Bologna,” it is called Enoteca Italian. Like every place in Bologna, it has a deli case with meats, cheeses and other premade delights you can have with your wine. Oh Italy. There are two gals nearby drinking a whole bottle of bubbles and just got super stoked that this English song came on with the chorus “I just want to feel this moment” which I now realize is that Pitbull and Christina Aguilera song which just rips off Take on Me by A-Ha.

I won’t lie staring to feel like I’m riding the struggle bus understanding when the Italians speak English, I’m not upset about it like duh it isn’t their first language, but I think maybe I just bought this whole bottle of Albana? I sure hope not lol. This is not a “drink a bottle of wine” type of day, I gotta navigate the autostrada tomorrow and drive 3 hours north to Bolzano in the big red Doctoro. I am discovering that in making such grand plans for this vacation that a lot of time is spent figuring out how to get from point A to B and taking away from the whole “relaxing” part of the trip. Living and learning everyday!

I’m at dinner now and I guess this place is actually called Osteria Santa Caterina. I wish I had it in me to do a second course but all this bread everywhere all the time has me Bloat City USA over here. I went with more some tortellini Bolognesi with cream, and I got my own person shredded parmesan bowl to garnish at my whims. Could I have tried something different? Maybe but in between that and the fried pork cutlet with prosciutto, this seems the lesser of two evils. This is where it’s getting solidified for me that if you want to enjoy your emails unencumbered by secondhand smoke, eat inside. With dinner I had some more of that delicious sparling pignoletto and some non-skin contact Albana. Now for dessert I’m having the traditional Bolognese, rice cake with a Muffato which I must have missed in Italian Wine Scholar. It is from Umbria and made with noble rot grapes of Gewürztraminer, Sauvignon Blanc, Grechetto, Riesling and Semillon—I don’t know if I can finish this rice cake though, oooooffffff. I bought a bottle of passito Albana to take back to the us because I’m pretty sure I’ll never see it over there! Passito means the wine is made from semi-dried grapes, therefore concentrating the grape sugars. There are some high acid grapes in this blend so it is an excellent balance of acid to sugar.

Saturday, April 6 - Bolzano

Well, it has been an interesting day so far, only a few mental breakdowns. Today was a day where a travel buddy might have been nice. I managed to leave Bologna, get on the A22, drive 3 hours North and into the parking lot of my hotel in Bolzano. The Doctor politely reminded me after an hour of driving if I would like to stop and take a rest and get some coffee. Thanks for looking out Doc. I liked seeing the scenery slowly start turning into mountains. Once at the Park Hotel Laurin, I adrenaline crashed. Then there was the great room mix up. They informed me that they upgraded me to a bigger room. Cool I think. I get to this room and it has two twin beds shoved together with a massive crevice in between, obviously a sleeping situation meant for a couple. It did have a really nice big bathtub and a bath would’ve been amazing but I went back down a requested by original room with a queen bed. My new (original room) just had a shower but oh well. Despite the promise of air conditioning in this famously hot town, I am told it isn’t on yet because we are “between seasons.” Information that would have been nice to have on the website. I ask for a fan in the hope that I can blow in cold night air, but there is a big language breakdown over the fan because they still think I’m talking about the A/C. We eventually get there after some charades. I’m a bit embarrassed about it but in Bolzano, English is third on the list of language after German and Italian. After I was finally in my room, unpacked, with said fan, I stripped and cried nude on the bed desperately trying to cool down. After composure was regained, a warm beer I bought in Bologna chugged, and a light hair and make-up refresh, I went down for my complimentary drink. It is some South-Tyrol special and made of gin, apples, and rosemary. It was fucking delicious. Please take my hormonal stress away gin.

Afterward I walked through the car-less/historical city center in which a large outdoor market was happening. A man made me try dried mango like it was the only dried mango that has ever existed, plucked from the trees by the gods and air dried with the saints’ breath, and something that looked like red pop rocks but was another dehydrated fruit of unknown origins. I meandered more until I made it to my destination of the Archaeological Museum to see Otzi the ice man, but more on that later. 

After Otiz, I tried to go to two different wine bars, but they were closed, but it was also a Saturday evening, so I was confused, Italy businesses are opened and closed at the strangest times. The new expectation is just be prepared for a backup plan.  I found a little park called Madonna Park and just stared at the mountains surrounding the town for a while and tried to settle into my base for the next 3 days. I found a semi-rowdy bar that was opened called The Black Sheep. Had to bust out the Italian to get a seat and the cute bartender pointed to the Grauburgunder as a good wine rec. I was also given free chips and two mini bruschetta. Okay Black Sheep. I have a nicer dinner reservation at 7:15 at Frankenstuben which I think I dressed okay for but after Bologna, I’m super in my head about how “American” I look. Any confidence I had in my ability to be fashionable has taken a one-way ticket to anxiety town.

The menu at Frankenstuben is very overwhelming but in a good way in that everything looks amazing. If only I could concentrate on it and not the 2 unattended children running back and forth trying to take out waiters, I’m sorry unless you have entered into a shared parenting plan with everyone in this restaurant, put on your spatial awareness hat. Started out being adventurous with the deer carpaccio with pickled mushrooms, arugula and parm. It was good but large, so I only ate half so I could try other things. Next I had a cream of asparagus with speck and boy oh boy was it more speck forward, a real all-inclusive stay in ham town. For a main dish, I had the dumpling trio of brown butter, spinach, and bacon and cheese with a cabbage salad. My favorite was the spinach, and I had a glass of Gewürztraminer for the first two courses and a Lagrein of rose for the main. Lagrein being a native grape to this area. Lagrein is an intense red grape varietal. Full-bodied, high tannins with big bold flavors of blackberry, black current, and with savor bitter notes of coffee and cardamom. It also has one of the highest anthocyanin concentrates of all red Italian grapes. Anthocyanin = high antioxidants.

Anway, back at the hotel having a limoncello spritz nightcap. I’m dubbing today, “Weepy Saturday” cause the piano man at this bar just started playing a beautiful rendition of Blackbird and then my favorite song from the Amelie soundtrack by Yann Tiersan, and I’m having big feelings about it because the PMS is PEAKING right now. In happier news, my hike tomorrow looks sunny and high 60s, but still bummed we could not do the original planned route. I really hoped all major snow situations fucked right off.

So, let’s get back to the Otiz facts that I mentioned earlier.  This is like, the world’s oldest ice mummy who was found in 1991.

·       5,300 years old

·       the museum had to develop a special technique to preserve him to mimic the conditions he was found in

·       5’2 – wore leggings

·       his ax tip established the area of Tyrol was actually 1,000 earlier in the bronze age than original thought – and it was from Tuscany blowing everyone’s minds and expectations about who was trading with who at the time

·       sewed his own leggings, and everything else he was wearing

·       was murdered – arrow pierced his axillary artery (armpit) so he bled out real fast – he died within feet of the Austrian /Italian border and both countries fought about who should claim this discovery

I feel like it was fratricide. You know I love some historical brother beef.

Sunday, April 7 – Dolomites/Bolzano

Gianluca picked me up at 9:00 as planned and we drove up to Lake Carezza for what I would barely call a “hike”… more like a 15 minute walk around a small lake but of course the views of the Dolomites were incredible and I got to hear the folklore about the mermaid statue in the bottom of the lake. Surprise it involves a stupid man (in the case a wizard) trying to punish a woman who isn’t all that into him. There was still some snow on the path but the temp was def high 60s. The lake was beginning to thaw and you could see the top of the mermaid’s head. Normally she is completely submerged in summer. Found out the best month to actually visit here is September. Noted.

The ranges I got to see were the Latemar and the Rosengarten. Gianluca was very knowledgeable (though a bit long winded, and he was up front and even admitted on the ride up “I like to talk”) I asked him if he was an only child and my suspicions were confirmed. Look takes one to know one. And while I’m technically not an only child anymore (my half sib was born when I was 16) there was much self-entertaining going on at the beginning. Gianluca told me the history of his passions in the car. I could write an essay about this man at this point. He took me on a scenic drive to try and make up for the original plan and we stopped at this bucolic 14th century  church for a good photo-opp. I also got to see some truly insane places rich assholes are trying to build houses accessible basically only my helicopter or the road that is only drivable half the time, and I also got to see some heroic viticulture, I’m talking about little patches of vines on top of vertical cliffs with drop-offs to certain death.

Back in town, he also took me on a mini-30-minute walk through downtown and showed me some breweries (I’m at Batzen Brau right now) the Ginko Biloba tree that Empress Siss planted in the 1800s and a church with a cool green tiled roof. Got a few more food recs and overall, it was a very informative tour. I’m obviously at Batzen during an employee break period because I’m getting hella ignored but the beer is good and I thought I was ordering a salad thing with potatoes, but it ended up being more like cheesy potatoes with some greens on the side. The potato to lettuce ratios is hilarious. Sure, more carbs.

Now I’m at Signore Vino because it is the only wine bar that is open on Sundays, plus they were giving out free samples in the square earlier. I’m having a sampler of Franciacorta (which is famous traditional method sparling wine from Lombardia, and Valpolicella Ripasso (which is a very specific wine making technique from the Valpolicella region in Veneto). At Signore Vino they have me these fucking delicious parm dusted crackers with these little salami nubs, so cute so delicious, they are perfect lil’ bites. I can’t wait for it to cool down later. It’s been 83 in town all day.  I wish the fan was running but the room is one so that the electricity is only on when you are physically in the room with the key. Signore Vino is on the main Piazza/Square called Walther Platz. I like the vibe of this Piazza; it feels more local and homier and not as chaotic as Bologna.

Time to check the weather and hope the expected rain for this week has fucked right off and it appears the weather gods are shinning upon me because the only rainy day appears to be Wednesday. Too bad it’s for Garda. Other facts from Gianluca that were not about himself were about the autonomous region rules. Like if a population is more German than Italian the signs must be in German first. If you are an Italian you have to take 6 years of German and vice versa. Ther are some signs by the government building where he works that I might read more about later. He also told me I absolutely need to find an apple streusel to eat because the 5 things the area is known for are mountains, wine, beer, apples, and milk.

Monday, April 8 - Bolzano/Termeno/Montagna

Wine tasting day No. 1! Jumped into the Big Red Doctor and made it to my first winery, the J. Hoffstätter winery in Termeno Italy in the autonomous province of Alto Adige/Südtirol where its apples on the valley floor, and vineyards on the hills and mountain sides. It was a beautiful spring day, and all the flowers were growing right alongside the baby buds of Gewürztraminer. Vines here are planted on both sides of the Adige River and at altitudes of 820 to 2,788 ft! The Gewürztraminer, Pinot Bianco, Pinit Noir and Lagrein vines enjoy a mixture of warm and cool mountain breezes. Inside the winery there were some very nicely lit stainless steel tanks and concrete eggs, but the highlight was definitely the “wine walk” they have out back where you can enjoy view of the hillsides and the town’s ancient clock tower.

Termeno itself is German speaking town and when I was told by my navigation that I needed to drive into the winding streets of this small village, I panicked, but eventually found a parking spot, then walked around a bit to survey street signs and a quick way out of there to avoid vehicular manslaughtering some pedestrians. I would say if you wanted to hit a lot of wineries in one day or spend most of your time in this region wine tasting this is a good home base, though more quant and less to do than Bolzano. There were a few lovely looking restaurants open for lunch and I had an “alpine pizza” for lunch which was made with all local ingredients including alpine salami, Pomodoro, local mozzarella and a nice crisp thin crust.

Before I could head to my next tasting in Montagna, I had to finally fill up the Dr. with petrol and boy the struggle was real. Before dealing with the gas nozzle, I definably got checked out by a hot dude on his way to his tractor as I tried to clean 1000 bugs off the windshield of the car. Sexy. I could not figure out how to pay for the gas, so I had to go into “the Moose” where I was probably looked at like a museum artifact by all these ancient old village men. The semi younger owner saw me on the struggle bus and helped me figure out where to pay, turns out there was only one payment terminal per pump and mine was on the other side. $80 for the fill. Please last me till Venice Dr., I don’t want to do that again.

I drove across the Adige river admiring blooming apple tress as I went over to the steep slopes near the village of Montagna for delicious mountain Pinot Noir from Pfitscher. Pfitscher prides itself on its organic, alpine wine from high altitude vineyards and a commitment to environmental sustainability. They grow a diverse number of varietals that include Pinot Noir, Sauvignon Blanc, Müller-Thurgau Gewürztraminer, and Lagrein. They have a beautiful tasting room with floor to ceiling windows which allow you to take in the view of the Bassa Atesina valley which contains a mix of limestone and porphyry soils. The village of Montagna is actually where the soil type splits! Truly a lovely experience and complex and delicious wines to boot! Daniel Pfitscher was my host and good god what a beautiful man. Also joining us was Armin, his new tasting room prodigy. It was at Pfitscher that I found out that there are only two manufacturers of concrete tanks in basically all of Europe and they are right next to each other outside of Venice. How Hatfield and McCoy, how McDonald and Campell of them. There are enameled non enameled versions of the concrete and different shapes as well. Egg or square? Personally, I want to know how practical an animal shape might be.

After my two wine adventures it was back to Bolzano, no roundabouts were missed, no toll both transactions went awry. Yes! Master of the Road. Well, A22. I’m praying to the road gods that they continue to look fondly upon me. Man, I sure am tired of secondhand smoke. I wonder what Europe’s rate of lung cancer is compared to the US. Speaking of the US, it is the 2024 Solar Eclipse today AND Rex Manning Day. Say no more mon amore for those who celebrate.

I am now at Vogele for my dinner reservation. Ancient Alpine hut vibes, tiny uncomfortable small wooden chairs for toddlers. Ambience 9. Comfort 2. I had another go at an asparagus soup (no speck this time) and success! VERY asparagus forward, it was a bit much at first, but the flavor grew on me. For the main I wanted beef, but they were out so I got a ravioli dish in which the sauce was literally just so much butter and bacon fat and it was gross. I ordered something else and now I think my waiter hates me. I also can’t tell if all these elder couples are insulated by my presence because I’m feeling very stared at, including one man kitty corner checking out my legs? He’s making a face, I guess when you are 75+ you give zero fucks what your wife thinks.  What is happening here? There is a dog that just came in and I want to pet it sooooo bad, but I get the vibe that Italians and Germans do not what you to pet their dogs. Oh well. It’s my last night in Bolzano, so off we go.

 Tuesday, April 9 - Garda

Well here we are in Garda, or as I immediately realized as I got here, that Italians call this “The Lake of The Germans” which I don’t quite understand as it looks like there plenty of lakes closer to Germany than Garda… maybe it has something to do with Garda being Italy’s largest lake.

My hotel is called Casa Lady and it’s cute and clean. They seemed a bit harried at the check in situation, but the room is a good size, and it really is right on the lake. Said Lake is unfortunately very hazy and overcast today. It is pretty humid, so yeah, the views are kind of garbage right now. I did a bit of duck watching (they are THEE premier waterfowl entertainment) and basically walked the whole lake front of the town. I won’t lie, I’m a bit disappointed, but this is a reminder that with any vacation, not every expectation or “vision” can be the reality of the situation. It is just much more touristy than I was hoping, I was expecting a more authentic Italian lake town but it’s hard to distinguish one restaurant from the next, all with large format laminated spiral bound large-ass picture menus that is giving off big TGI Fridays/Red Robin vibes.

The town’s one museum is closed and so is the La Rocca fort I wanted to visit. Booooo. Maybe Bardolino was the better town to stay in. I think I’ll swing by there after my wine tasting at Tenuta La Ca tomorrow. Right now, I’m at one of those indistinguishable restaurants that had the comfiest looking chairs. Maybe I’ll just go on a “which patio chairs are the most inviting tour.” I’m having a glass of Chiaretto Rose and an overpriced caprese salad. Chiaretto Rose is wine from the Bardolino DOC. This is Garda’s thing. Its rose is made from Corvina, Veronese, Rondinella, and Molinara grapes.

I’m sure this place is nuts in the summer. On my walks earlier I bought some silly little classic souvenirs, like a shot glass and a mini shooter of pistachio liquor because I’m on a mission to try everything pistachio. I will say the ducks here are like kin to a new York pigeon or an aggressive highland seagull because they are all up in tables looking for scraps and dropped morsels. Maybe I can procure a boat tour tomorrow or something but the vibe here is really “sorry we are closed.”

I think I have a scalp sunburn somehow? Anyway, saw a boat coming in, thought it might be a tour boat thing around the lake, turns out it was a water taxi, oops! But it does go to that one town that has a castle and some architectural ruins, but I don’t think I’ll have time to do that tomorrow and it’s too late now in the day. I decided to just keep following the path around the lake. At one point the paved part ended and it turned into gravel and pebbles of white and coral colors. There were a few designated swimming areas and some very palatial residences started to emerge from behind tree shaded gates. It got me thinking that if I was bougie rich that it would be fun to rent a house on the lake for a month and just lounge with friends for an extended period, do lake shit. On my walk, I saw a path that people kept turning up towards, I was curious, but it looked pretty uphill and honestly who knows how long it goes and at some point I will need to walk back. All in all, a pleasant walk.

After my walk I found a wine shop. The women there was really nice. I had two glasses of wine, a Custoza DOC which is south of Garda and a region that grows Trebbiano, Garganega, and Cortese, and something called a Goldtraminer, which is basically just Gewürztraminer from Veneto.  I bought a few food vitals and mini gifts, and I was offered some free salami that some dude, presumable the local meat man or butcher, had brought the lady. It was very good.  Of course, no snack or meal taken outdoors without your secondhand smoke garnish. I just watched all the shop ladies’ gossip and go back and forth to each other’s shops to gossip. I bought a beautiful sage leather backpack purse then headed back to Casa Lady for a rest before dinner.

I decided to try the Casa Lady restaurant. The waiter that had helped check me in earlier in the day and who I thought had spoken good English, all the sudden had forgotten how to speak it and was very harried. It is unfortunate because it’s a very cute place but the vibes here are a bit off, everyone seems very stressed all the time and it’s not even that busy. I asked for sparkling wine, got sparkling water. I finally gave up and just asked for “any white wine” and was given soulless pinot grigio. I ordered some local trout dish with risotto and “milk cream” with radicchio and boy was that radicchio forward. It was okay.

Wednesday, April 10 - Bardolino Classico DOC

Today, I am in the Bardolino Classico sub-zone which is close to the shore of Lake Garda and therefore benefits from the lake’s temperature moderation and it also receives protection from the cold northern winds by the Monte Baldo range. To have the Bardolino DOC label the wines can only be red or rose made from a blend of Corvina, Corvinone, Rondinella, and Molinara. However, that doesn’t mean white grapes can’t grow here and many places are making white wine under the IGP designation.

Had a wonderful tasting and tour at Tenuta La Cà which included a sparking, a chieto (rose) and some exciting white blends involving Trebbiano, Gewürztraminer, Pinot Grigio, and Pinot Bianco…oh and some special single varietal Pinot Bianco and Garganega. You could tell they were extremely passionate about the terroir. La Cà is also organic and relies heavily on the lunar calendar for their viticulture practice. The winery had some cool equipment too like this automated punch down “hat”, two chambered stainless-steel tanks, baby concrete eggs, and barrels of varying wood type including acacia which is different.

One of the winemakers, Pietro, nerded out on some soil and geography stuff with me—that a glacier had basically created the rift that created the valley and had come to rest in the hole it had created and melted into which was Lake Garda.

Next on the very windy Bardolino adventure was Villa Calicantus in the village of Calmasino. Vila Calicantus is a small biodynamic winery close to the southeastern shore of Lake Garda. They cultivate Corvina, Rondinella, and Molinara, to produce 5 wines that aim to be 5 authentic and unique expressions of these grapes and their terroir. Their tasting area is beautiful, with old buildings with cracked stucco and an old arched brick barn situation and I feel like I finally got to see some of that Italian charm. They offered a food pairing course with their tasting which involved some of the best pickles I have ever had, an array of meats and cheeses with zucchini marmalade and these local butter cookies with raisins which is the only time I have enjoyed raisins in a cookie.

There were even some cute winery cats. One was particularly nice but as I found out when it literally jumped into my lap that it really just wanted my food. Another cat came up because that game was a foot but then it was time to start shooing them away. My meat kitties.

I got to chat a bit with the winemaker, Daniele. He was super kind, and he knew about Portland and offered to let me walk up the hill to see the view and his highest elevation vines if I could brave the wind. Did I mention it’s extremely windy today? No rain but damn! Challenged accepted. He gave me a glass of one of his special wines and off I went. I don’t know what an Italian Lake Hurricane feels like, but I feel like this is it. But it ended up being kind of fun bracing against the wind while sipping my delicious bonus wine. I made it to the top where I sat on a little bench surrounded by trees and just took in the lake views and communed with the wind. This wind actually has a name, it is called the Ora Del Garda, and it helps moderate temperatures not only in the Veneto, but also in Trentino and Alto-Adige.  

Next I went to the “wine museum” in Bardolino and I have that in quotes (which I know I overuse and probably incorrectly) because it was more a vehicle for the Zeni family estate to sell their wine. I liked seeing the old presses and their free 6 taste wine dispenser machine was fun choose your own adventure tasting experience. I also tried two Amarones (big mistake) because I got super flushed and headachy despite my vigorous water consumption between tastings.

I went back to Garda, where the foggy haze from yesterday had finally lifted and to see the lake as it is meant to be seen. Took a two-hour rest before dinner at Osteria Porto which was recommended to me by the wine store lady as the most authentic of the clone restaurants. It was just okay, I had pike on polenta which was quite good and a pizza that had a whisper of saltless tomato sauce. Took one final nighttime leisurely stroll by the lake and saw all the far away twinkling light of the other towns before heading to bed.

Thursday, April 11 - Soave

Made it to Monte Tondo too early for a formal tasting, and too early for a fully formed opinion but the room is nice and a 5-minute drive from the medieval center of Soave. Monto Tondo has a nice garden and pool situation, but it really is like right off the freeway, but I knew that from prior research.

I am currently in the historic city center which is pretty wild coming through arched entrances and exits that have been around since the 1300s. I am at an enoteca called Enoteca di Soave. Had a glass of Soave with a mediocre caprese sandwich because the tomatoes just need salt.  Salt is not an enemy Italy, though I’m probably just conditioned to salt being an American.

Been walking around Soave the past hour and it really is wild how so much of the original town is still intact. They also have this little art exhibition going called “Cracking in Love” that has a bunch of large colorful plastic animal sculptures that are very vibrant and are a pop of modern in the ancient. So far I have seen snails and birds outside the walls, and inside bunnies, dogs, cats, meerkats and an elephant. I also “accidentally” walked up to the castle entrance because I just kept following the garden staircase up and up and the views of the city and surrounding country just kept getting better and better. Saw the “pre-alps” which is exactly what it sounds like— the baby mountains leading to the actual mountain. I did consider going to the castle since I was technically there, but it didn’t open until 3 because lunchtime in Soave is from 1:30-3:30 – lol the 2-hour lunch everywhere…amazing. I did manage to find an open place for a glass of Soave and the tiniest pistachio tart I’ve ever seen.

Okay we are now post two wine tastings. I don’t want a fancy dinner so I’m at this small plate place called Mura Soave. The local fish specialty here is COD. Lol, Portugal Flashbacks.

Alright let’s get down to some general Soave knowledge before we dive in.

Soave grows two white grapes that can be in a Soave Classico DOC: Garganega and Trebbiano di Soave (which is a biotype of Verdicchio). The classico sub-zone designation means the grapes must come from the classic area: The hills between the villages of Soave and Monteforte d’Alpine. Each hill has a name which is the wine’s Cru. Speaking of the village of Soave, it still has its medieval fortress/castle and village wall built in 1375 around the village center. From there you can walk up to what is left of the Castle, which was built in the 10th century.  This is significant for our first winery, Cantina Del Castillo because it is the only winery actually INSIDE the village wall! Their cellars are in the house of the original guy that built the fortress to back before the village was fortified. There is even a secret passageway in the cellar that leads to the Castle that was there before the city wall.  Bottom line, this winery has truly unique history and some super delicious wines! What I loved about Soave is that I was finally able to experience the same grape or grapes (if a blend) across 4 different styles! Sparking (made using the Charmat method) Classic (crisp, clean, early drinking) Soave with a little oak ageing, and of course Recioto Di Soave which are dried either using appassimento or picai methods of drying. Appassimento means the grape are laid down on straw mats in open barn situation to let the air dry them out, or picai means they are hung vertically, tied together with twine and hung from rafters in a similar environment that allows the air to dry the grapes. This concentrates the sugars but since Garganega is such a high acid grape the wines never feel syrupy or heavy. If you ever get a chance to try one, you absolutely should!.

Next I went to Coffele, which had piqued my interest on my earlier walk. It is what drew me into yet another fantastic wine tasting in the historic center of the village of Soave. The tasting room is in an old 17th century palace. The Coffele family has been making wine since the 1800s. Their vineyards are in the most northern part of the Soave Classico area and benefit from high altitude and sunny, breezy days.  Like most wineries visited thus far, they are also certified organic, and they use horses to help till the soil. You know I love a good equine helping make the wine! I also loved that they used the picai method of air drying their Recioto. Usually, it’s done on straw mats but only the ideal conditions make picai work.

After Mura, I came back to Monte Tondo and basically had to guilt trip the front desk guy into a mini tasting because all the sudden the 5 pm tasting in English tomorrow didn’t exist and was now at 2. I was told that most of the wineries will also make a Bordeaux blend on the side because back in the day someone planted merlot and cabernet sauvignon for funsies and to drink since they had to export and sell all their other wine. I didn’t try that at the last two places, but I tried it here since it came with a backstory, and it was pretty good! Very dried cherry, and minerally, taste the volcano. Monte Tondo is newer (1970s), but I guess compared to the others, that makes sense!

Friday, April 12 - Soave

Woof, the body is starting to feel it. You would too if you were only sustaining on travel adrenaline, Soave, coffee, meat, bread, and oh all those lovely pistachio delights. It’s going to be veggie cleanse city once I’m back in the states.

On this day it was time to do some wine tasting outside the walled village. Pieropan is a beautiful winery that was built INTO the hills of Soave. Construction began in 2016 and was completed in 2021. The excavated dirt from the dig out was added back into the landscape and on top of the roof to make the winery integrated into the earth. Started in 1880, the Pieropan family is now in their 4th generation making wine. The views from the winery are gorgeous and they even have some cute robot lawn mowers making sure the property is always looking resplendent. Their concrete tanks were installed as part of the build and sorry not sorry but I just love some well-lit concrete tanks lol and Pierpoan delivers on the aesthetics! I had a Classico which was an 88% Garganega blend. A fancier 100% Garganega with oak ageing, an Amarone, and a Recioto di Soave. This recioto was not as sweet as the others and had an herbal/basil like palate happening.

Next I headed to another tasting room in the city center called Canoso where there was more of the same fair but with a few new things like a 100% skin contact Garganega and additional ageing beyond the DOC regulations. A PIWI that is Riesling/Pinot Bianco situation (but why?) and a new grape I had not heard of called Durella which was made traditional sparkling method. Or maybe I had in IWS but oh well! It’s a native Veneto white grape that is versatile due to its high acidity. Well either way it was a bit on the funky side. Also tried their recioto, which also uses Picai. This one was more amber since they are going for a more oxidative style. I’m staring to get a bit nervous since I have to drop the Dr. off at the Venice airport tomorrow, figure out the Alilaguna shuttle water taxi thing to Venice and cross god knows how many bridges to find my hotel.

Today I am actually going up to the castle. Did the stairs again instead of driving. Once at the castle, it turns out the tour was only offered in Italian so all I had was my small English brochure and my imagination. I tried to follow along for a bit and dude tried to include me with his one English word which was “chimney” before I let him off the hook and went exploring by myself. Turns out I was right about the place that I went into that was like a tower you could see up into the sky but with places that led to other parts of the castle.  I was like “this was the body dumping chamber/jail” and it was the torture chamber! There were many more stairs winding up to the highest towers, but it was worth the 360-degree views of Soave. The house part of the castle was weird too. I left my H2o bottle at Canoso so probably the worst time to be waterless but a good excuse to come back and chat with the hot waiter who liked my wine stickers. I wish dinner was a bit earlier here, nothing opens until 7:30 and I feel like I get stared at here when I eat alone. I just had another glass of wine here at Conoso and some snacks.

Saturday, April 13 – Venice

Wow, what a journey. It’s 2:12 pm and I made it to Ai 4 Feri Stoli for a late lunch. I got a funky lunch of pasta with red pepper and gorgonzola sauce. I successfully dropped off the rental car (sort of) because my rental car company booth was under construction and there isn’t much room to drive on the roof of a packed parking garage. I bought a ticket and boarded the Alilaguna Blue Line and boy of boy don’t need to do that again! I’m splurging on the boat taxi back to the airport. I mean I’m glad I tried and know what that is about but Jesus Christ it is a load, SLOW boat PACKED with people and all their shit.

The 10-minute walk to the hotel turned into a 20 minute one because I seriously underestimated the heat and how many bridges with stairs I was going to have to traverse with a carry on. I’m staying in the Cannaregio district away from away from San Marco. The micro hotel is called Ca’Gordatti and it is literally just a bed in a corner ladies and gentlemen. Two feet from the bed is the bathroom. The front desk dude was very nice though and OMG there isn’t air conditioning again. It is so comical at this point. Started walking around to find food and boy oh boy google maps is on the struggle bus here. The signal cannot penetrate the narrow streets and tall buildings. It turns out there are only two bridges that cross the grand canal, OOPS! AND a shaky gondola ride across it will cost you 2 Euro. Venice is a vibe. Tons of people, itty bitty alleys. I walked by a fish market that was getting cleaned out and all the seagulls were swarming the fish guts & bones and it smelled REAL bad and I bet this place in summer, whatever charm and beauty is, is cloaked by people and smells, I mean it already kind of smells like farts here, farts and you guessed it, secondhand smoke.

Finally made it to the Ca’Rezzonico which is a museum for the height of Venice high culture the 18th century. According to the trip advisor who will explain it better, “Immerse yourself in Venice's Age of Decadence with a visit to this lavish palace of the Venetian aristocracy Rezzonico, which houses an unsurpassed collection of eighteenth-century Venetian art. The museum remains an outstanding example of period atmosphere and style. Its rooms not only contain works from one of the most flourishing eras of European art, but also recreate the pomp and splendor of an 18th-century Venetian residence. On display are masterpieces by Canaletto, Giambattista and Giandomenico Tiepolo, Rosalba Carriera, Pietro Longhi and Francesco Guardi.”

The museum was very cool…the grand ballroom alone I could’ve hung out in for a lot longer. Tons of cool frescos, paintings, furniture and books weird gross anatomy books from the 100s to the 1800s. I bought what passes for a pornographic picture book with Casanova quotes and a small, abbreviated history of his life. Right now, I’m having an Aperol spritz at a bridge called the Ponte dell Academia and just marveling at the sheer number of selfies happening on this bridge. It’s one of the grand canal bridges and yeah the people watching is good in this city. I wonder how many selfies I accidentally bombed today. Tomorrow I hope to score a romantic gondola ride with myself where I plan to be “sad alone girl” in many tourists’ photos.

Well, in a very silly twist, I thought I was navigating to a different restaurant for dinner but I’m literally back at the same place I was for lunch I think because this place does have two different names and I wrote them down on two different lines making it look like two different places. OOPS. The two amazing ladies from lunch took pity on me and said they could squeeze me in if I ate in an hour. Deal. I asked for the most traditional thing on the menu and got a big ol’ plate of fried fish delights of sardines and octopus (IM SORRY!) shrimps, and some other white fish (its cod stop pretending its anything but) and fried potato and veg. I think the most pressing thing after dinner is I have to figure out how to get back to my hotel without the gondolier shuttles which stop at a certain time and then your only options are the two bridges or figuring out the other water taxis. I’m also having a Venetian pudding for dessert. After dinner I had to go back across that god dam Rialto Bridge, which is like such a shit show, at what point does these experiences start feeling inauthentic and just a box you tick off on your list? Checkbox one – kissing selfie on Rialto Bridge, checkbox two – gondola ride (OKAY IM GUILTY I want to do this one) …I don’t know if Ill ever come back here.

Sunday, April 14 - Venice

It is the last full day here in Italy. The morning started out peacefully enough. I shelled out $120 Euro for a gondola ride though the small canals and very small portion of the main canal. My gondolier was very nice, everything was “over 500 years old” but it was a quiet and chill morning, and I enjoyed seeing all the old windows and doors from this vantage point. I talked with him about the blessing and the curse of tourism. I liked how each time he approached a corner he yelled, and I guess all this yelling is essentially the equivalent of a gondolier stoplight.

I found the wine bar I wanted to go to on the long main street called Fodamenta Della Misericordia when I was INUNDATED with a heavy flow of people from a cruise ship? A convention? Their badges all had “Suzo” on them. Anyway, they seriously impeded my cicchetti crawl. Cicchetti are basically Venetian tapas, little one to two bite snacks. I was in the wine shop called Vino Vero first and was trying to talk wine with the employees until their attention was pulled to like 20 Suzo assholes and it felt like the NYE stock exchange. I managed to sit in the window with my white wine and 3 cicchetti: beef tar tar with mustard, caprese, and octopus and avo. They were good. Next was A La Veccia Papussa; snapper cream with pistachio, gorgonzola with walnut balsamic, and swordfish with herbs.

After my crawl, I walked around the Jewish Ghetto, and bought a Murano glass duck to keep my uranium duck company. Stopped at another cicchetti style tavern and had an orange wine.  I am now at Bodo café having a negroni and watching boats. It’s way more chill over here than it was yesterday by the main bridges.

After a brief rest and the hotel and a mini heat related melt down, I cooled off, chilled out and made a plan to at least go to St. Mark’s Square and see what the hell that is about. I became one with the never-ending wave of people, giving myself to the herd and even just straight up joined a tour group because I decided I would rather let this lady with a little flag guide me other than google.

Once at the square, I finally got to see what the hell Saint Mark’s Basilica was about and how that church is in fact crazy on the outside. I’ve never seen such ornamentation outside a church that old before. There also appeared to be a museum dedicated to Marco polo that would’ve been cool but oh well, not in the cards today, and maybe never.

I’m now at a place called Osteria del Lovo, I don’t know, it looked the least touristy as they were not pitching their menu to me to come in like they were trying to sell me a used Buick La Saber. I’m having a scallop crudo and a carbonara because gotta try one while I’m here. The food was pretty good!

After dinner I made my way back to the hood and happened upon a cute wine bar called Trattoria al Bomba. Shit…I should’ve come here for dinner, way more my vibe. I tried one of their cicchetti that I have seen around called a sardine “saur” (sour?). It’s lightly breaded, fried then served cold on bread with lemon and pickled white onion. Having with a glass of Grillo which is actually a native grape to Sicilia but it was good, grapefruit forward and herbal and nice salinity.

Well, this is probably the end, gotta figure out how to pack all my wine delights and make some attempt at sleep before my boat ride to the airport, what a weird thing to write…